RIDICULOUS!

I have been nothing but good to the world of restaurants. And how do they repay me? WITH RIDICULOUSNESS!

Let me explain: Saturday night, I was going to pick up some pizzas for my little brother and his friends. I had to hurry because I had plans to go out to eat at someplace where the food is actually good. When I got to Little Caesars, I was astonished to find that there was a wait for the pizzas! SO MUCH FOR "HOT-N-READY"! They should have been called: "Cold-piece-of-dough-with-various-ingredients-in-different-containers -that-someday-could-become-a-pizza" pizzas!

So you can probably guess what happened next. I jumped over the counter and brutally attacked the employee. Using two pieces of Crazy Bread as nunchucks, I gave that girl a beating she won't soon forget. Too harsh you say? NO! Let me state my reasons.

REASONS THAT GRAPHIC VIOLENCE WAS JUSTIFIED

1. I was short on time. The ONLY reason people go to Little Caesars is because they are short on time. How could they honestly expect me to wait for a pizza. If I wanted to do that, I would have ordered from a DECENT pizza joint.
2. I have always wondered how much damage one could do with two pieces of Crazy Bread.

So as you can probably guess, this means that no one is allowed to go to Little Caesars anymore. BOYCOTT IT! Thanks.

Oh and another thing. Have you heard of the new Arby's Roastburger? It kinda reminds me of a sick roast beef sandwich but with lettuce and tomato. Know why? BECAUSE THAT IS ALL IT IS!

"Hi. Welcome to McDonalds, what can I get for you?"

"Hey yeah umm. Ok can I get a quarter pounder with cheese except for could you hold the delicious hamburger patty and give me sick tasteless roast beef instead? Yeah thanks. Oh also, hold the cheese and please charge me more for it."

As always, thanks for reading. Peace.